Save Us from Military Action and the Sun Giving Us Gas

Sam and I have got to quit checking out the news. We saw on NBC the other night that the state of Georgia is going to allow firearms in airports, churches and some government buildings. But aren’t those the very places berserk gunmen have been killing people?

Then we come across the news that many states are considering limiting the use of the new e-cigarettes. So, the do-gooders don’t want us to use tobacco products, but when we find a substitute they don’t want us to use that either? We’re glad marijuana’s legal now. Where can we get a baggie?

Last, but certainly not least, our country is sending military troops into Poland and some other Eastern European countries to “bolster” them against Russian aggression. Dear God, how stupid are the do-gooders anyway?

The troop thing is so ludicrous. We’re sending 150 troops each into Poland, Estonia, Latvia and Lithuania, for a total of 600, to counter the Russian “provocations” in the Ukraine. So, if thousands of Russian troops invade the Ukraine and just happen to spill over into Poland or one of those other countries, 150 U.S. troops are going to stand up to the Ruskies and stop them? How do you spell AWOL?

Somebody needs to quit listening to John McCain and his do-gooder cronies who believe that America is the toughest military force on earth. We may be, but as wars in Korea, Vietnam, Iraq and Afghanistan SHOULD HAVE taught us, we are not the Holy Roman Empire dominating the world - or even close to it.

Sam and I vowed recently to try and write a more humorous and positive blog, but try as we might, wanna’ be do-gooders keep proposing STUPID ideas! And you realize, don’t you, that typing words in capital letters is tantamount to shouting? YES, we are shouting. Doesn’t anybody out there have half a brain?

Fortunately, if we want to stop the world and just get off apparently we can. Scientists reportedly have discovered an Earth-size alien planet - an "Earth cousin" - that just might have liquid water and the right conditions for life. According to Space.com, “The new found planet, called Kepler-186f, was first spotted by NASA's Kepler space telescope and circles a dim red dwarf star about 490 light-years from Earth. While the host star is dimmer than Earth's sun and the planet is slightly bigger than Earth, the positioning of the alien world coupled with its size suggests that Kepler-186f could have water on its surface, scientists say.”

Seems to Sam and me like we’ve heard this before though. And what kind of name is Kepler 186f? NOT so appealing that we want go there. Uh, unless the Russians are coming.

But hey! If there is another earth-like planet out there we might be able to escape our earth’s gravitational pull and avoid the stratospheric cost of the fuel by using Sun-Gas in our rocket. A guy named Brad Hoppmann, Publisher of something called Uncommon Wisdom Daily, insists sun-gas, a liquid fuel that combines the sun’s energy and water (uh huh!) will do the job. (Why does he sound sort of like Donald Trump?) Ol’ Brad insists, “Over a dozen scientists across the country (have) quietly found a way to harvest the sun's energy and mix it with water to produce this new type of gasoline called Sun-Gas. And it's 20-times more-powerful and cleaner than natural gas.”

Sam and I don’t make this stuff up. We swear it.