I Dreamed of Boats, As in Boatloads of Money

I had a dream.

No, I’m not misquoting Martin Luther King Jr. I dreamed (not dreamt) last night that I was participating in a boat race. Funny thing is, me and the other racers were piloting our crafts through the sky somewhere over a semi-arid landscape and there was a jetliner up above us acting as sort of a chase plane. So what do you dream analyzers make of that? I don’t know what to think. Sam wasn’t in this dream like he usually is. Maybe my dream was brought on by that sugary angel food cake I ate for desert.

At least I wasn’t running with the buffalos. Did you see on TV or YouTube that some buffalos were running in Yellowstone Park and a lot of people reasoned that was because a volcano was going to erupt. You never know, animals are pretty sensitive to things that are about to happen, but I’ve seen the buffalos running in Yellowstone and I think they just like to show off for the tourists - you know, sort of like a Far Side cartoon.

I’m not watching a lot of TV these days because I dumped the DISH and bought a ROKU 3. So far I’m pretty disappointed. I don’t have to pay for DISH anymore, but I can’t get live sports on the ROKU; not for free that is. While some things on ROKU are free, many are not. I thought about subscribing to the MLB channel so I could watch baseball games, but it would have cost $129 for a year - which isn’t too bad - but the dang site says it will black out games my home team plays. WTH!? That sucks. Why would I pay for something I can’t even get? Boy, these TV people, especially sports people, sure know how to stick it to you. On top of that, the site says it would automatically renew my subscription at the end of a year if I didn’t cancel. I hate places that do that to me and so many internet sites want to. Once they get your bank account number they never want to give it up.

If I could have any dream I wanted to have I’d dream that one of my books was noticed by somebody famous, read on YouTube and started selling like hot cakes. Then some hotshot Hollywood producer would make a movie from one of my books and the movie would win an Oscar and my reputation would be made. I don’t care about becoming famous though, I just want to get rich - you know, hit the mega millions, earn some hefty spondoolicks, yada, yada. I mean, I wouldn’t mind appearing on Jimmy Fallon (I would have preferred Jay Leno) and yucking it up with that dude a little, but other than that . . .

Wait a minute! I think I’ve got it. My dream about boat racing means my boat (ship) is about to come in. Woo hoo! Excuse me now while I start shopping for my new sports car with a rumble seat for Sam.